God's Answers (or lack thereof)

A recent struggle that I have been facing is what seems like a lack of answers from God. I am controlling to a fault, and part of me being in control of my life is knowing what my future holds. I have felt so frustrated lately because questions about my health, college, and life in general have gone unanswered by God, no matter how much or hard I pray about them.

In the midst of my frustration though, I feel God teaching me a lesson. Isaiah 30:18 says, "Therefore the Lord waits to be gracious to you, and therefore he exalts himself to show mercy to you. For the Lord is a God of justice; blessed are those who WAIT for him."

While it seems like everyone around me has already been accepted to their dream colleges and has a roommate and dorm decorations all planned out, I wait for the Lord to answer my questions in His time, all the while learning how to lean on Him.

I've been struggling with recent (mysterious) stomach pain, and while seemingly endless doctor's appointments have yielded no answers, I hear God asking me to wait for Him. My friends have reminded me (many times) of the story of the Bleeding Woman, and how her faith and trust in God eventually led to healing-- and an answer. Matthew 9:22, "Jesus turned and saw her. 'Take heart, daughter,' he said, 'your faith has healed you.' And the woman was healed at that moment."

You know how the saying goes- "patience is a virtue"- and the Lord knows I need to work on mine.

I've also seen God relieve my anxieties in other ways. Last week I finished my last college application, and got everything in on time! I also finished my Senior Speech, and now that those two things are over I have felt a huge weight lifted off of my shoulders. I also got to visit my very best friend and had an awesome weekend of much-needed relaxation with her by my side. I guess God is answering my questions and relieving my anxieties in little ways. And those are the kind of things I will cling to until my big questions are answered-- in God's Time.

xoxo,
Rachel

"But they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall walk and not faint." - Isaiah 40:31